Not Without Love

I am finding that I love almost everything that this artist writes. I was listening to two of his albums today and in both he had a track that was just spoken word poetry. This was one of those poems. I'd encourage you to read it aloud. It's beautiful, especially as we consider celebrating freedom tomorrow.


Not Without Love (Benediction)
By Jimmy Needham


I tried Lord
I tried Lord
I tried hard to be Your good little boy
Chin up, head high
All zeal and no joy
Thinking all my good deeds could please Jesus
Boy, was I wrong
Though I knew the right songs, all my cymbals and gongs played the melodies wrong
And it wasn’t long ‘til I saw my disease
A life spent wanting to please
On hands and knees
To make right, to appease
God help me please
This can’t be Christianity, it can’t be
The whole thing’s like insanity
Where’s the rest of eternal security?
Where’s the hope of a God big enough to cope with all my hang-ups and insecurities?
Certainly this isn’t breathing
My chest burning and heaving
It’s like my pulse is ceasing
Like my heart quits beating
Yet this I recall to mind and therefore I have hope:
You died, Lord
You died, Lord
Assuredly, like the coming of the dawn, the Father’s love song goes on
Drowning out my bitter songs
And breaking through walls and barriers
Christ swoops in, removes sin, picks up His bride and carries her
So I can sing in agreement with the King this thing:
There’s only one thing that pleases the Father
The God-man on the tree in the midst of the scoffers
Now I finally see that Christ is what Christ offers
And I’m finally free in the love of the Father

Dearly Loved

Dearly Loved

Jimmy Needham

Please lay down your arrows
For they're sure to pierce the skin
And water from a broken well
Will make you thirst again
When all things you've acquired
Are tested by the flames
And you can see them melting
Then will you call his name

It's worth it brothers
It's worth it friends
To know your maker
To lose your sin
Did you know that you are dearly loved

To the slaughters you are being led
Being told that it's a party
That this God is in your head
And every single lie
Sounds just like the greatest truth
But the one truth you're not hearing
Is that he died for you

No greater joy
No greater peace
No greater love than this

It's worth it brothers
It's worth it friends
To know your maker
To lose your sin
Did you know that you are dearly loved

But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions - it is by grace you have been saved.

Ephesians 2:4-5

Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.

I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands.

Psalm 63:3-4

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!

1 John 3:1a

"When I hear people talking about love like it's the latest, greatest flavor of cotton candy, I get very nervous and suspect we are not talking about the same thing."

Jen Lee

This is a new favorite song of mine, moving me to tears because of the reality of its truth. My dear sister Sarah sent me this last quote a couple weeks ago and it deeply resonated with my heart. I feel that love is one of the most misunderstood and shallowly represented constructs within our world. And the thing that astonishes me the most is that people seem to be okay with that. The devasting thing is that when I try to describe love to other people, I find that my proclamation of this truth leaves much to be desired. Yet I look around me as see people, as C.S. Lewis did, happy to be playing with "love mud pies" when a holiday in a sea of love is afforded to them. And I have to conclude with him that we are "far too easily pleased."

Recently the university I work at had an essay contest among the faculty called, "Why I Teach." As I pondered when or not to submit something I thought back and forth about why I teach, why I lead, etc. It's not because I have vast amounts of knowledge to impart or am even close to being able to use my life experiences as vicarious sources of learning. It is because I believe that the greatest, sweetest truth that everyone needs to learn is that they are DEARLY LOVED - specifically, intentionally, uniquely, dearly loved by God. And I believe so strongly that anything that is truth will point to this life altering, soul filling reality. So I teach the truth I know and I lead for change that eliminates lies and darkness because people must know that they are dearly loved.

My life has been a learning laboratory for love, and I hope that it continues to be. One reason that the truth of love is so difficult to articulate is because it's often deeply felt rather than only cognitively processed. The limbic system in our brains (bear with me here) is the physical seat of our emotions and drives. It is full of feeling and not rationality, passion and not logic. And it isn't anywhere near our brain's cortex (where cognition is processed) or Broca & Wernicke's areas (where we develop language and the articulation of our ideas). And so in my little life laboratory, when I see or hear or read or look at something that can connect the all of those areas in my head and empower passion with knowledge and ignite logical truth with fervor, I most often just start crying. Because what my heart felt as true and my mind knew as true connect and fill my soul with the light of truth. And almost always that truth is that I am dearly loved, incredibly unworthy, and miraculously redeemed.

Last night, Pat Terenzini in his opening remarks at our conference said that learning or education is "not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire." So while I still feel that my words above are shallow and disjointed, I guess my observation and question to you is this. We are all learning and teaching and following and leading, but what fire are you spreading? Because, in case you didn't know my brothers and sisters...

...you are SO DEARLY LOVED! 

Endurance, Gracefulness, and Courage

Me, Elliot & Ev (what joys they are to my heart) at Butterfly World on our Family Summer Vacation

The most sacred place dwells within our heart, where dreams are born & secrets sleep, a mystical refuge of darkness & light, fear & conquest, adventure & discovery, challenge & transformation. 

Our heart speaks for our soul every moment while we are alive. Listen... as the whispering beat repeats: be...gin, be...gin, be...gin. It's really that simple.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               Just begin... again.

Royce Addington

It was January 2004, my sophomore year of college, when my dad called each of us kids individually to talk with him. No warning. I figured he liked to shroud these sorts of encounters in mystery, which always made me anxious. Like most people, we did not have family meetings because things were going well and we just wanted to sit down and talk about how grateful we were for each other, eat lollipops and put roses in our hair. Nope. We had family meetings because something was wrong and it needed to be fixed. 

However, this was different. This was an occasion that made a mark on my spirit and life and made me feel incredibly loved, especially as I think about it now. During our time together my dad shared that each year he would personally and privately reflect on his own character and pick three character qualities to work on in the coming year. (He used the list developed by the Character Training Institute, found here) That year he had also reflected on each of his children and three character qualities he saw could be developed in them. He wrote those on a piece of paper, along with some Bible verses to memorize and meditate on. We sat and talked about different practical ways that these underdeveloped areas could become stronger. 

I don't know if my dad thought this was very effective because we never did it again as a family, but I asked for my own copy of the little Seven Leadership Perspectives card and their character qualities. He gave one to me and I still have it in my Bible, next to my Lifting My Husband through Prayer card.

Each year, now I go through my own reflection time, thinking about last year and the year ahead. This year only one of my "character resolutions" comes directly from my card, and I'm trying my hand at creating the other two. Here they are...

Endurance vs. Giving Up

The inward strength to withstand stress and do my best.

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving."

Colossians 3:23

"Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."

1 Peter 5:8-10

Gracefulness vs. Carelessness

Having beauty of form, composition, movement, or expression in daily words and actions.

"She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her househol and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her."

Proverbs 31:25-28

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."

1 Peter 3:3-4

Courage vs. Cowardice

The ability to confront fear, pain, risk/danger, uncertainty, or intimidation and act rightly in the face of popular opposition, shame, or discouragement.

"This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life so that you and your children may live, and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to His voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life."

Deuteronomy 30:19-20a

And so I begin again! Though my heart is more fearful than inspired, my body is tired and my mind is dull, that is often the way things have to be in the beginning for transformation to actually take place. 

I am grateful for 2011 and the love and blessing it has already brought, and I look forward with hope to what it will bring in the days to come.

Freedom...

I haven't been posting lately, because I've been busy and have not been particularly inspired about much of anything. Fall is actually a pretty rough time of year for me, and while there are numerous blessings that come with it, I still have not been able to figure out how to connect with God, connect with people, and balance my life in a way that is healthy during this lovely autumn season. However, having gone through this several times before, I think I am starting to see the signs earlier and recognize that I need to focus on things and people outside of myself to truly remain "Alive, Radiant, & Free" during this time of year. 

I've been reading "God Came Near" by Max Lucado...and loving it! And I've also been drawn back to my passion for showing people the bright and permeating love of Christ that has been provided to us to set us free! In revisiting this topic, I have been encouraged as Jesus shows me anew the intimately personal yet infinitely boundless love that He has for me. I've also been realizing how much of this freedom stuff requires a paradoxical balance between the grace of God and my own personal responsibility.

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm then, and do not let yourself be burdened again by the yoke of slavery." 

Galatians 5:1 (NIV)

"Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies."

Philippians 4:8-9 (The Message)

Here are some ways that I am trying to fill my mind and my hands and our home with excellent and freeing things.

One of my co-workers recently welcomed a new daughter-in-law into his life, and at the center of her work and passion is Freedom 424. I think she and I would really get along and I would love to see her branch out and bring some of her work to Indiana. I'm in the process of contacting her to see what we can do to help. Check out the video of her work...It's just a few minutes long, but I promise you will be inspired by what someone my age(ish) can accomplish with creativity, passion, and the Holy Spirit. Christine went to Thailand (among other places) and was overwhelmed by the bondage that young girls in the red light district faced there. After talking with her father, they realized that it would cost $24 to "buy" one of these girls for a night, in which they are able to share the love of Christ with them and give them opportunities to get out of their current situation. It is truly touching and something that I would like to get involved in.

Freedom 4/24 - Our Story

On a similar note, I'll be hosting a party at my house in November for Women at Risk International. You know those Pampered Chef, Mary Kay, Premier, etc. parties you can host at your house? Well, unlike those parties, the host does not get any special gifts or discounts. BUT...we get to have a good time and help women caught up in human trafficking around the world. WARInternational is Christian non-profit organization based in Michigan and has so many practical ways that you can help change the world from your living room available on their website. One of those ways is hosting a party in which you sell goods made all over the world by women who have been rescue from the sex slave trade or are at risk of entering into it. Check it out and let me know if you'd like to come!

http://warinternational.org/

Happy 2010!

So, I have a confession to make. I wasn't all that excited about a new year....until today. My heart has felt a bit weighed down by feelings of inadequacy. As I thought about 2010, it was almost as if the year were looming before me like a tower that I knew I was powerless climb, or at least unable to climb well. I'm someone who is used to achieving. It's both a strength and a weakness. I'm also competitive and like being at the front of the pack. So it's difficult for me to claim responsibility without also claiming authority. It's difficult to achieve without it being the best.
However, as I processed through all of this, I'm reminded why I started blogging in the first place. Because the Lord has powerfully shown me His love, and this relationship set me free. Despite my inadequacies, I am loved! Despite my unique characteristics that I can at times become a slave to, He offers me freedom and empowerment through those same qualities lived out through His strength. And even though a tower looms and taunts me, my incompetence is an opportunity to grow in humility and courage. Because of these things, I now approach 2010 overwhelmed with HOPE! Empowered by my King -- alive, radiant and free!
2009 was another ringer of a year, but as I look at it I am amazed by God's faithfulness and sustaining hand. We started out the year living in Fort Wayne with Evan out of work. Most days, I was on the road for around  4 hours. In the midst of this hardship, we were blessed with a great church and amazing friends that encouraged, challenged and supported us. Our marriage grew stronger because it even more truly became ours, as we battled ideas and criticism and culture. My husband was an innovative provider, and I grew to appreciate and respect him more than ever. We vacationed with family in Florida and Virginia. Times of rest that were much needed! We celebrated Mothers Day and Fathers Day and THREE birthdays! On Evan's birthday we moved to Upland. I feel like we have been in this little town forever, and it's only been five months. We have a lovely little home with a yard and a hammock and a garden (hopefully). We feel safe and have found a new church home. While work has been tedious and trying this semester, I now only drive up to an hour a day! And Ev can walk to work. He's in a job that he loves working with some godly men in an environment unlike any he has been privileged to work in before. Elliot is growing and learning. And as Evan said the other day, each age that he is is my favorite. I love being his mommy.
I actually went through my 2009 calendar the other day, because I had forgotten so much of what had happened, and I am overwhelmed with gratitude and love for my Creator and Sustainer! I am also incredibly thankful for the support system that He has enabled me to build into my life. I have the best bunch of family and friends a girl could hope for. And if you're one of them and reading this, thank you SO much!
I've made many goals and have lots of ideas for 2010, but mostly I am looking at it full of hope. Waiting to see what God is going to do in, through, and for my family this year.

DONE!

Final grades are entered. My office is clean. And my computer is shut down...at work. I am done with the fall semester of 2009! Praise the Lord! While there have been many MANY good things about this semester, it has also been a stressful burden that I am glad to be rid of.
So here I am, back to blogging and the like, doing a shortened version of the advent calendar with my son, wrapping gifts, and very much enjoying the holiday season.
On the holiday agenda for today:
1) Joseph's story for the advent calendar
2) Tea with the Smith ladies
3) Wrapping gifts
4) Making a wreath (my husband has been requesting this for about two weeks...thanks for being patient, my Love)

So for those of you faithful readers that were missing my posts, I am not dead, just basking in the warm feeling of completion and a cup of tea. Ah....freedom!

About Growing Up

In my UNV180 classes, we've been talking about emotional intelligence. One part of this is recognizing the emotions impact our motivations very strongly. For example, anger makes us want to fight for or against something or someone. If we're experiencing fear, we want to avoid. Happiness enables us to explore, and sadness moves us to give up.
For the most part, American's (and this is a vast generalization) seem to be afraid of negative emotions. So they don't do well managing them. Instead we act like they don't exist, or we're so blatantly honest about them that we become abrasive. When we're experiencing negative emotions, those in relationship with us are either confused or cringing.
But negative emotions are an adaptive function that are a gift that God has given us, and a resource that Christ used in his relationship with God, with others, and in his ministry. He was sad, angry, fearful, and disgusted at times and yet did not sin. And guess what? His strategy for not sinning was not denying his emotions, He accomplished the task set before him by using and managing his emotions appropriately. I'm so glad that Jesus' life is written out for us to see! It gives me great encouragement and hope.
Lately, I've been dealing with a lot of mixed emotions concerning my capacity for growth in different areas and my ability to influence. Substantially investing the love of Christ in people's lives is my passion, by bringing healing, freedom, and the idea of potentiality to their hearts. I've found myself a bit stagnant, just trying to maintain rather than progressing, being more reactive than proactive, operating more out of an external locus of control than an internal one, comparing myself to other people and their circumstances rather than rejoicing in my own. This makes me sad, and honestly, just motivates me to give up.
However, I have had a few insightful and inspiring conversations in the past few weeks that have made me both happy and angry (an odd mix, I know), but it moves me to explore options and fight for those things that are important to me.
First, Dr. Jim Laub in his talk about leadership on Thursday night said that Servant Leadership is something that he believes in very strongly but he probably isn't very good at, or he has trouble practicing. I look at this man and think, "You've got to be kidding! You're one of the best examples of servant leadership I know, and you write and speak on it all the time." His transparency and humility spurred on my thinking though, and actually helped me immensely. There are so many things that I believe in very strongly, but struggle to practice with excellence. Does this mean that I stop trying to practice them? Does this mean that I stop believing in their effectiveness? No.
Second, I talked with Bill about the difference between "inspired annoyance" (a concept we talk about in leadership) and discontentment. He said that the difference is not necessarily the feeling that you get, but what you do with it. When experiencing inspired annoyance, you are motivated to act, to change, to make things better because they're not right yet. When experiencing discontentment, you typically sit back feel sorry for yourself and gripe. So...I'm in a constant state of reaction and maintenance, does this mean that I stop trying to change? Because I'm tired, it's easier to sit back and gripe, but is that really what I believe in? No.
Third, my husband is one of the wisest men I know. He can teach profound truths through simple illustrations that make sense to your mind and heart. We were talking and I was expressing some of my feelings about work and life. Then he started talking about growing up. At first I thought, "Were you even listening to me?" But this is what he said. There are some sad things about growing up...like the first time your birthday isn't a big deal anymore (experienced that, it's kind of sad), or when you realize the things that people used to praise you for are no longer a big deal (like when a little kid starts singing for the first time we get super excited and love all over them, but if they start singing in the middle of the movie theater or at a program we tell them to be quiet), or the first time you realize no one is going to give you a gold star or pat you on the back for doing your job. POW! Was I really being that ridiculous?! I was. I was working hard, doing my job, and expecting a gold star. It didn't come, and I was discouraged and sad. Seriously now?! Yes.
Work diligently as unto the Lord....Think on those things that are excellent and praiseworthy...Do not think more highly of yourself than you ought, but think of yourself with sober judgment...Exercise your gifts according to the grace given to you...Treat your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit...Bear the fruit of the spirit - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self-control...Love...Do not let yourself be burdened by a yoke of slavery, because Christ came to set you free.
Why? Because it's easy? Because I know it will be effective? Because it's in my nature? No.
I choose to be Superman, rather than Peter Pan (if you haven't heard that song yet...you need to...it's right here...my brillant rockin sister wrote it).
Why? Because I'm a grown up who believes that it's true!

A Young Professional

So...I'm a woman and young and a professional, and let's just say there are some struggles that come with that...particularly the young and woman pieces of that equation, but especially the young part. There are some verses that I memorized as a child or teenager that didn't really impact me much at that time, but carry great weight, conviction and encouragement now. 1 Timothy 4:12 is one of those.

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity."

We had a speaker on campus this week that spoke on growth for a few days and one of the things he talked about what how God tests us to produce growth. I am tempted when challenged about my age or my experience to get defensive or discouraged, because those are things that I can't change about myself right now. I can build and I can grow, but that takes time.
Here's the thing. God didn't call me to title or money and frankly He didn't even call me to experience. He called me to build His kingdom on earth, to help people realize their value and worth, to fulfill their God-given potential and to be transformed from brokenness to wholeness because of the grace of Jesus Christ. To do that, I simply need to live life fully and freely, love fiercely, pursue purity, cultivate faith, and proclaim the excellencies of Him who called me out of darkness and into His marvelous light.
And THAT...that I can do at age 25 or 250 and every year in between, and I guarantee you, I will never be more fulfilled! So thank you for the test and thank you for the reminder that I have been given a spirit of power and greater is He who is in me than he who is in the world.

I am Free!

Through you the darkness flees!

Through you my heart screams "I am free!"

I am free to run

I am free to dance

I am free to live for you

I am free, 

Yes! I am free!

(Picture posted on Flickr by bella - Music by The Newsboys)

Ephesians 4

I'm going to share some helpful hints for communication soon, but as a preface to that, I thought I would post the following verses from Ephesians 4. I have been praying bring a new freshness to my mind. One that is less cynical and more uplifting. I've noticed a lot of miscommunication...and let's face it, just poor communication among people that ought to be showing each other love and grace. And I think that I'd rather be part of the solution than joining in the problem that exponentially increases with every individual that latches on.

I'd love for you to join me! What speaks to you in the following passage? Where can your communication grow and your mind be refreshed?

¹⁷So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. ¹⁸They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. ¹⁹Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.

²⁰You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. ²¹Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. ²²You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; ²³to be made new in the attitude of your minds; ²⁴and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

²⁵Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. ²⁶"In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, ²⁷and do not give the devil a foothold. ²⁸He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.

²⁹Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. ³⁰And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. ³¹Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. ³²Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

I'm Falling in Love...

...with the book of Galatians! 1 Peter has been one of my favorite books in the Bible for a long time, but over the past several months, I keep getting drawn into Galatians. If you haven't read it, it's a book about grace and freedom. Paul wants to make it perfectly clear what the purpose of the Law is and it's utterly ridiculous ways that it is used by Christians. I find it so interesting that while we rebel against the Law in so many ways, we don't really want to let it go. And even if we do let the specifics of Old Testament law go, we create a new Law in our heads and hearts that we feel we need to live by to gain an advanced standing with God...to make Him like us more, to earn His approval, to somehow show that we are worthy of His love, or to pay Him back for what he's done for us. We seek perfection, when we've already been made perfect. We seek righteousness by following a set of rules, rather than by displaying grace and love, when we've already been washed with His blood and can approach the throne of the Almighty God with confidence. We seek to level the playing field, to back a debt, that we simply cannot pay back, because if we could, Christ died without cause or reason. Here's how Eugene Peterson transliterates Paul's words in The Message:

You crazy Galatians! Did someone put a hex on you? Have you taken leave of your senses? Something crazy has happened, for it's obvious that you no longer have the crucified Jesus in clear focus in your lives. His sacrifice on the cross was certainly set before you clearly enough.

Let me put this question to you: How did your new life begin? Was it by working your heads off to please God? Or was it by responding to God's Message to you? Are you going to continue this craziness? For only crazy people would think they could complete by their own efforts what was begun by God. If you weren't smart enough or strong enough to begin it, how do you suppose you could perfect it? Did you go through this whole painful learning process for nothing? It is not yet a total loss, but it certainly will be if you keep this up!

Answer this question: Does the God who lavishly provides you with his own presence, his Holy Spirit, working things in your lives you could never do for yourselves, does he do these things because of your strenuous moral striving or because you trust him to do them in you? Don't these things happen among you just as they happened with Abraham? He believed God, and that act of belief was turned into a life that was right with God.

Scripture backs this up: "Utterly cursed is every person who fails to carry out every detail written in the Book of the law."

The obvious impossibility of carrying out such a moral program should make it plain that no one can sustain a relationship with God that way. The person who lives in right relationship with God does it by embracing what God arranges for him. Doing things for God is the opposite of entering into what God does for you. Habakkuk had it right: "The person who believes God, is set right by God—and that's the real life." Rule-keeping does not naturally evolve into living by faith, but only perpetuates itself in more and more rule-keeping, a fact observed in Scripture: "The one who does these things [rule-keeping] continues to live by them."

Galatians 3:1-8, 10-12

God's love for us is limitless. It does not get bigger or smaller based on what we do or do not do. As a father loves his children, he wants the best for us and lays out clearly what that best is - the ways to be most alive, most radiant, most free, until we fully are because we see Him face to face! The ending behavioral result may not look much different to an unskilled observer, but there are worlds of difference between a slave to the law and a free man who lives in gratitude to his gracious and loving Redeemer.

Let Freedom Ring!

Happy Independence Day! I hope you all have a chance to celebrate and enjoy liberty in a new and fresh way today. I know that there is a lot going on with our country and anyone can find something to complain about or be worried about, but I would encourage you, even if it is just for today, to realize the beauty around you an recognize the sacrifice of those that serve in our government and military. Let's stand resolved to affirm what is good about living in America, and tomorrow, if you find that you like it better, we can go back to our typical way of talking about our country.

It may be someone you know that serves our country in official role, or it may be someone who has fought for your freedom on another level, but find them today and thank them!

Thank you Dad for the work you do both inside and outside of your home! You are an exemplary patriot and soldier in the army of the Lord.

Thank you Evan for protecting freedom in our home and in my heart! Thank you for leading our family as a warrior poet who stands for truth and justice and loves openly and unconditionally. You are my hero!

I couldn't end this post without a big "THANK YOU!" to my Jesus! You have taught me what freedom truly is, regardless of where I live or what I do. Thank You for your sacrifice and deep, wide, boundless love, and for the amazing grace You give to a girl that deserves to be in bondage. I want to better live with the fullness of life that you offer, reflect the radiance of your light and truth, and display and dispense your grace and love that offer freedom and peace!

Free to Feel

This photograph was shared on a blog - KindOverMatter. I think it's lovely!

(Thanks for the tip, Heather!)

I Like to Hike!

Sarah and I went hiking today. It has been awhile since I've been on a good hike, and this was a REALLY good one! Here are some snapshots of our adventure on the Ridge Trail along the Blue Ridge Mountains.

At the beginning of the hike, Ev dropped us off at the "Scenic Overlook" where there was a lone college guy sleeping in 

his car.

Sarah at the Summit! (She is powerful and free!)

Coming down off the mountain!

 

At our special spot - PSALM 19!

One Day at a Time

In addictions counseling, we have a well-known saying: "One Day at a Time." The idea is that if you thought about being free from an addiction or not struggling with it for the rest of your life, that's a little too daunting to handle, so you just take each day and say that you will be free for that day. 

I'm a long term thinker and planner, which in some situations is a great thing, but in others my laundry list of "to-dos" can become somewhat overwhelming. So I just have to take my own advice and take the day that I am in and make the most of it.

Today was a fabulous day. I cleaned the carpets in two rooms this morning while Ev finished up some work and sorted out a bunch of stuff in Elliot's room. Then Beth got here and we all went to the mall and got free Lush cosmetics, a free carousel ride, and a free pretzel!

Ev and I then went on a date. When we got out we realized we picked prom night to go to Biaggi's...bad idea. So we went to Panera, Von Maur, and DeBrands instead. It was really nice to have a couple hours together! 

I have a lot to do tomorrow and this coming week, but for right now, I'm just going to take it one day at a time. :)

Day of the Blue Marble!

God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground."

Genesis 1:28

I find it so interesting that God has given us the responsibility of "subduing" the earth. In common English dictionaries when referring to land, "subdue" actually means to cultivate, rather than conquer or destroy. What a joy to be stewards of cultivating the earth that declares the glory of God! I guess I have always thought about the responsibility of being a steward of God's creation, but not about the impact that cultivating it can have on others coming to know God more fully. Romans 1:20 says that "since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities -- his eternal power and divine nature -- have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." So, I ask myself and those reading this -- As stewards of God's created world, ones that have been commanded to cultivate it, how are we doing? Are any of our actions, ultimately providing additional clarity to others' vision of God's eternal power and divine nature or are we just making that picture fuzzy?

I'm an advocate for doing little things throughout your life that can add up to big things. Just as working out 24 hours straight will not have nearly the impact that exercising an hour a day for 24 days would have, so one huge "earth project" will not have the same impact as several of us making wise decisions in our daily lifestyles about the stewardship of our resources.

If you think you're doing well with all of this, test yourself with one of the many ecological footprint calculators out there. These calculators aren't an exact science, but they attempt to measure an individual's demands on nature. I've done a couple and all of them have pretty consistently said how many earths we would need if every one lived a lifestyle like mine (I like this one! Check it out.) These website usually also have suggestions for how you can reduce your footprint, by just making small changes.

So...what are some changes we can make personally? Though somewhat overused, the old adage of reduce, reuse, and recycle is actually a good one! :)  Reduce the amount of electricity, water and gas used in your household (move your thermostat up or down a couple degrees depending on the season, wash clothes with cold water, etc.). Increase your alternatively energy options. Reuse items you already own by altering or customizing them (rather than buying something brand new, when you get tired of your same olds), shop at local businesses, eat foods grown within a couple hundred miles of your home,  reuse non-disposable shopping bags, plant plants!!!, recycle your paper, glass, plastic, and aluminum. The awesome thing is, these choices are actually economical. You don't have to be a millionaire to make a difference, and you don't have to be Al Gore to change the world. :)

New walls, New weather, New me

It really does constantly amaze me what a difference the seemingly small things in life can make! The winter months here in Indiana always effect me, and every year I forget how much the weather impacts me until the days start getting longer and warmer and I start feeling lighter, more free, and more me. Ever since the beginning of this semester, I haven't felt like myself at work, which is sad because unlike most people, I actually love my job and feel relatively safe to be myself there. But I believe the tide is turning, and it is so exhilarating!

ALSO, (thanks to the Heironimi and my lovely husband) the walls in my living room are now a pretty lilac rather than a stark white. This brightens my day when I come home...and it actually makes it feel like a home too. 

Because of the new weather and the new walls, the new me (really just the old me - rediscovered and revamped) can finally begin to emerge. Praise the Lord for the changing seasons, for challenge and reflection, for development and growth!

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.

Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge.

There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard.

Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world.

-Psalm 19:1-4-

Five Freedoms

Virgina Satir (1916-1988) was a family therapist that became internationally known and respected for her work as a therapist, as well as an author and educator. 

She believed strongly that no one was a beyond hope, and everyone has the potential for growth, development, and change. She was one of the first that looked at the positive connection and warmth that comforting, appropriate human touch can have in a therapeutic relationship. Though many have never heard of her, she has made valuable contributions to our understanding of human behavior. One of her contributions that I value most are her FIVE FREEDOMS. I hope you can try to apply them to your life and make your home a space of freedom as well.

1. TO SEE AND HEAR

What is here,

Instead of what should be,

Was, or will be

2. TO SAY

What one feels and thinks

Instead of what one should

3. TO FEEL

What one feels,

Instead of what one ought

4. TO ASK

For what one wants,

Instead of always waiting

For permission

5. TO TAKE RISKS

In one’s own behalf,

Instead of choosing to be

Only “secure”

And not rocking the boat

Why Alive, Radiant, & Free?

Living, actually living, fully and freely in a way that reflects Christ's lovingkindness and proclaims His excellencies. 

You know those moments in your life? They are rare but powerful, and they remain in your memory as a crystal clear snapshot. Maybe for you it was a time that you felt especially close to God or maybe you can remember the day you first traveled to a far away place or maybe it is one of those milestone markers in life - when you got your first car, had your first child, or finally realized, "This is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with!"

Well, my first child, Elliot, was born this last September. What an unexpected JOY and DELIGHT! And I realized that Evan Gilmore was the person I wanted to share the rest of my life with almost five years ago while my mom was having unexpected open heart surgery.

For me, another of these moments came when I was a junior in high school. I had just experienced the most physically grueling four days of my life, in which I (and sixteen team mates) backpacked, canoed and portaged all over the Canadian wilderness that is - Algonquin Provential Park. On the fifth day, we were challenged to spend over seven hours completely alone. In the middle of the day, sitting in the middle of a boulder on the edge of a small island, in the middle of a lake, in the middle of Canada - it happened. My mind can instantly recount the details of those short moments with extreme clarity. And from those few moments, I realized the majesty of God's creation and the great extent to which he will go and has gone to express his love and reveal his truth to us! I knew that my mission in life was to help other people see his truth in creation and his love in me. 

With that said, the metamorphosis of loving like God loves and discovering his truth in order to proclaim it in various methods and forms is going to be a personal life-long process and not a change that takes place in a matter of a few moments of intense transformation. 

This blog is a small effort to incorporate you on this journey....if you choose to come along! I hope that it can be small rest stop as you peruse the "wide wide world of web" (as my husband jokingly calls it), where you can find encouragement, hope, fun, and truth that helps you feel a little more alive, radiant, and free!